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Intentional Living

The Podcast

#310 Understanding Our Adaptive Child - 'Us- by Terrence Real

In Terrence Real's new book 'Us', (one of my newest favorites) he talks about our adaptive child.  This is the part of us that learned to adapt to the dysfunctional parts of our childhoods,...

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#309 What An Equal Relationship Looks Like

When I work with many of my clients regarding their one-up and one-down beliefs and behaviors, they often find themselves at a loss to describe what an equal response would look like or sound like...

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#308 Stop Dabbling and Start Doing

Some of the areas where we can feel the most stuck in our lives are places where we are just dabbling with change in our lives rather than digging in and doing what needs to happen to create the...

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#307 Curiosity, Not Criticism

When we're not paying close attention, we can very easily slip into critical words and behaviors in our relationships. Often, we won't even see it, because in our minds we are being helpful or just...

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#306 The Problem with Happiness

We live in a society that can be a little happiness obsessed at times. And though the thought of being happy all the time can sound lovely, it's just not going to happen. Life is meant to be messy,...

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#305 When We Don't Feel 'Good Enough'

Most of us, at one time or another, have had a story that we are not good enough.  And it can really wreak havoc in our lives.  It can cause us to feel insecure, and from that place we...

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#304 Personalities, Preferences, and Perspectives

It is really easy for us to create dysfunctional and destructive relationships when we haven't learned how to respect and honor others' personalities, preferences, and perspectives. These three...

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#303 The Thought Model Reteach

Although I talk about the thought model and use it here on the podcast, it's been a while since I talked about the basic parts of it and how they work together. On this podcast we will be looking...

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#302 Gottmanā€™s Four Horsemen ā€“ Destroying Relationships Has Never Been So Easy

John Gottman is a brilliant relationship expert who has done an amazing amount of research on what makes marriages successful. He has identified four elements of dysfunctional behavior in marriages...

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#301 The Primitive Brain Problem

Our primitive brain does some amazing things for us. However, if we aren't paying attention, it can keep us stuck and struggling to create the kind of life we really want to have. When we learn to...

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#300 Lessons Learned From the Second Year of Our Second Marriage

Today Sione and I are celebrating our second year of marriage, and we have a lot to celebrate! In this podcast we are talking about how we have grown this past year, tools we have learned and...

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#299 Love Is Not a Reward

I think a lot of us grew up believing, at some level, that love was a reward for good behavior.  And yet, when looked at through the eyes of God, love is never a reward.  Love is actually...

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